Welcome to this week’s episode, a special rerun from our Speaking of Life archive. We hope you find its timeless message as meaningful today as it was when it was first shared.
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Program Transcript
Speaking Of Life 4010 | Hitting Too Close to Home
Heber Ticas
Have you ever uttered the words, “That hit just a little too close to home?” It’s a familiar phrase we use when something is said that makes us feel uncomfortable or embarrassed because it touches on a sensitive or personal subject. The words spoken may be neutral or even positive, but if it connects in a personal way, we may try to put distance between us and what was said. So, we say something like, “That hits a little too close to home. Let’s talk about something else.”
Have you ever considered that hearing the Good News of Jesus Christ may have the same effect? The Gospel is the good news that God’s grace and love, forgiveness, mercy, and reconciliation have been given to all in Jesus Christ. We may at first hear such a proclamation with warmth and joy but then some implications for us personally come to mind.
For example, if God has forgiven my worst enemy, I may have to forgive them too. Or, if God has reconciled all to himself in Jesus, then I may be expected to seek reconciliation with certain people I rather not have anything to do with.
Or, more personally. If Jesus is Savior of the whole world, then I will have to trust him as my personal savior. I’ll have to admit that I need saving and that I cannot save myself. In short, I’ll have to turn around and trust in this one who has saved me. You may want to respond with, “That is hitting just a little too close to home. Let’s talk about something else.”
Or the Spirit may be breaking in to form in you a different and better response. Perhaps a response like we see in Psalm 71:
In you, O Lord, I take refuge; let me never be put to shame. In your righteousness deliver me and rescue me; incline your ear to me and save me. Be to me a rock of refuge, a strong fortress, to save me, for you are my rock and my fortress. Rescue me, O my God, from the hand of the wicked, from the grasp of the unjust and cruel. For you, O Lord, are my hope, my trust, O Lord, from my youth. Upon you I have leaned from my birth; it was you who took me from my mother’s womb. My praise is continually of you.
Psalm 71:1-6 (NRSV)
If you feel like God’s Word is hitting a little too close to home today, consider this response of trust, and take refuge in him. In his love for you, the Father never takes back his Word. He means to “hit close to home” because our true home is with him.
Mi nombre es Heber Ticas, Hablando de Vida.
Program Transcript
Speaking Of Life 4010 | Hitting Too Close to Home
Heber Ticas
Have you ever uttered the words, “That hit just a little too close to home?” It’s a familiar phrase we use when something is said that makes us feel uncomfortable or embarrassed because it touches on a sensitive or personal subject. The words spoken may be neutral or even positive, but if it connects in a personal way, we may try to put distance between us and what was said. So, we say something like, “That hits a little too close to home. Let’s talk about something else.”
Have you ever considered that hearing the Good News of Jesus Christ may have the same effect? The Gospel is the good news that God’s grace and love, forgiveness, mercy, and reconciliation have been given to all in Jesus Christ. We may at first hear such a proclamation with warmth and joy but then some implications for us personally come to mind.
For example, if God has forgiven my worst enemy, I may have to forgive them too. Or, if God has reconciled all to himself in Jesus, then I may be expected to seek reconciliation with certain people I rather not have anything to do with.
Or, more personally. If Jesus is Savior of the whole world, then I will have to trust him as my personal savior. I’ll have to admit that I need saving and that I cannot save myself. In short, I’ll have to turn around and trust in this one who has saved me. You may want to respond with, “That is hitting just a little too close to home. Let’s talk about something else.”
Or the Spirit may be breaking in to form in you a different and better response. Perhaps a response like we see in Psalm 71:
In you, O Lord, I take refuge; let me never be put to shame. In your righteousness deliver me and rescue me; incline your ear to me and save me. Be to me a rock of refuge, a strong fortress, to save me, for you are my rock and my fortress. Rescue me, O my God, from the hand of the wicked, from the grasp of the unjust and cruel. For you, O Lord, are my hope, my trust, O Lord, from my youth. Upon you I have leaned from my birth; it was you who took me from my mother’s womb. My praise is continually of you.
Psalm 71:1-6 (NRSV)
If you feel like God’s Word is hitting a little too close to home today, consider this response of trust, and take refuge in him. In his love for you, the Father never takes back his Word. He means to “hit close to home” because our true home is with him.
Mi nombre es Heber Ticas, Hablando de Vida.
Psalm 71:1-6 • Jeremiah 1:4-10 • 1 Corinthians 13:1-13 • Luke 4:21-30
This week’s theme is love. In our call to worship Psalm, it is the Lord who is our refuge, deliverer, and rock of refuge who can be trusted. The Old Testament portion of Jeremiah recounts the Lord’s intimate words to Jeremiah assuring him of his calling and that the Lord will go with him. Our reading from 1 Corinthians 13 reminds us that love is the greatest gift of all. The Gospel text in Luke recounts Jesus was rejected because He extended God’s love beyond His hometown.
The Most Excellent Way
1 Corinthians 13:1-13 NIV
The last two weeks we have traced Paul’s words to the Corinthian church as he addresses some of the problems they have been struggling with. This week, we will continue where we left off, however we will not rehash an old problem or address a new one. Rather, Paul will fill out what he introduces as “the most excellent way.” We will see that this is how the believers in Corinth were to work through all the problems they faced, and it is the same way for us to move forward as well.
There are a few challenges in preaching this text. First, it is so beautifully written that adding words or commentary to it risks diminishing its impact. Second, it is such a familiar passage that we may not expect to hear anything new. Third, and most challenging, the passage speaks of “love,” which is a word so overused and misused in our society that the word risks becoming meaningless. However, we will read this passage in the context of the challenges Paul has been addressing with the Corinthian church. This will hopefully lift the passage off our wedding invitations and land it directly as “the most excellent way” forward for any particular problems we may be facing in our own churches and lives today.
Let’s give it a try.
If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing. 1 Corinthians 13:1-3 NIV
The necessity of love
The first three verses of this section speak to the necessity of love. Paul does not argue that we should dispense with spiritual gifts and only have love. Rather, what Paul advocates is that love should be the controlling factor of how we use those gifts. For Paul, to “have love” is to speak and act towards others in the same way God has spoken and acted toward us in Christ. So, we cannot detach love as some generic feeling or ideal that we possess apart from the revelation of Jesus Christ.
Paul takes issue with the Corinthian church for masking many sins under a label of “spirituality.” Other chapters in the letter record Paul’s correction of the Corinthian church for their tolerance and even endorsement of sexual immorality, greed, and idolatry. They did this while using certain gifts, like speaking in tongues, as a claim to spirituality. But their actions clearly indicate that they claimed a spirituality based on certain religious trappings while endorsing and even acting out a debased Christian ethic devoid of the love we see displayed in Jesus Christ. The love Paul speaks of is defined by the concrete act of Jesus coming to die for the sins of the world. That love certainly does not endorse the various sins our society would like to push.
Notice the theme of the language used in Paul’s comparisons to illustrate the necessity of love. He begins with speaking in tongues since that gifting seems to be the prevailing claim to spirituality. But he also includes things like prophecy, knowledge, faith, charitable acts, and self-sacrifice. Paul certainly does not say these things are bad or meaningless. Rather, these all reflect “religious” language and “spirituality.” The Corinthian church seemed to be more interested in their spiritual appearance than in actual love for their neighbor. Paul uses these comparisons with emphatic statements to show how they all amount to nothing without love. So, to just say or do “good” things is not enough. If those things do not build up the church, or edify the body of Christ, or bear witness to Jesus in our world, then we are no better than a “clanging cymbal.” That’s an interesting illustration Paul chooses to begin with since “clanging cymbals” were also used in many of the surrounding pagan cults. This seems to be a nod that their claim to spirituality by exhibiting certain gifts without having love was tantamount to being no better than the empty pagan culture around them.
Paul now moves on to describe the character of love. In doing so, he does not allow any room for any idealistic conceptions of love that fall outside the revelation of God’s love toward us as seen in Jesus Christ.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 NIV
The character of love
Paul includes fifteen descriptors to detail the character of love. The first two are positive statements, “Love is patient” and “love is kind.” These two statements taken together show that love plays both a passive and active role toward others. These statements point to the work of Christ towards us. He took our sins upon Himself and patiently endured them all the way to the cross, while at the same time exercised great kindness toward us and gave us all things that belong to Him.
Then Paul moves to list seven characteristics of love with statements of what it does NOT do. This list seems tailor-made for the Corinthian church. Each statement adds up, and essentially Paul says that love is not what you have been doing. Ouch! This list would make a wonderful study on its own and would be worth going through one statement at a time.
The next two descriptions, “Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth” probably are meant to be treated as two sides of the same coin. Here again we see a description of who Jesus is toward us and who God is in His very heart and character. God is a God of truth and because of that He cannot and will not affirm evil. If we truly live out the love of the Father poured out to us by the Spirit, we will celebrate and stand for all that is good while at the same time not entertaining or supporting that which is not aligned with the truth.
Paul then concludes his list. He adds four more characteristics that love “always” does: protects, trusts, hopes, and perseveres. Included here are both faith (trust) and hope which are the other two great Christian virtues. One thing Paul’s multiple descriptions of love provides for us is a list of checks and balances for our conceptions of love. We must hold all of them together. Otherwise, we could risk seeing love as just “kindness” towards everyone without resisting evil or holding accountable that which does not benefit everyone. In other words, love is not just a feel-good sentimentality. We should not treat others contrary to the way God has treated us in Jesus Christ. Paul’s list also gives us an opportunity to see an epiphany of who God has revealed Himself to be in Jesus Christ.
We could go back and substitute the name “Jesus” where it refers to “love” and it would read as an accurate picture of who God is in His very heart and character. That may be an exercise to do on your own. However, Paul means this list to be a point of reflection for the Corinthian church. So, we could also go back and substitute our name for “love” and see how we are doing. Where is there a call to repentance and an opportunity to receive more of the love the Spirit has for us? That too would be a good exercise to engage in personally.
The permanence of love
Paul now concludes as he proclaims the permanence of love.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:8-13 NIV
This section begins with “Love never fails.” That is a statement of permanence the Corinthian church needs to measure against the temporary nature of spiritual gifts, which Paul states, ultimately pass away and disappear. Paul is trying to redirect their understanding of being “spiritual” to that which is eternal. Paul does not devalue gifts, but rather highlights the importance of using those gifts to serve the purpose of love. If they do not use their gifts to build up the church, to edify and honor their brothers and sisters, and Paul himself, but use them for their own self-gain, then they essentially act like little children who have not grown up or like people who have confused a reflection in a mirror for a real person.
Paul concludes as he places love alongside faith and hope. In this way, he shows that love is in a whole different category and should not be equated with spiritual gifts. Faith, hope, and love continue in the present in all we do and say in the church. However, even here our faith will one day become sight, and our hope will be fulfilled when Jesus returns with His kingdom. And that kingdom will be one of love. In that way, Paul pushes the permanence of love to the very end.
This is a point in the passage where we can take a good look at ourselves and see if our efforts are aligned with what is eternal, or if we simply seek to achieve some temporary status in the present day. Those who belong to the church are called to be witnesses and citizens of another kingdom — God’s kingdom that will never fade. This world and all it claims to offer is nothing in comparison to where King Jesus is taking us. Jesus is real, and the love of the Father revealed in Him will never fail.
Rick Shallenberger—Year C Epiphany 4
February 2, 2025 — 4th Sunday after Epiphany
1 Corinthians 13:1-13
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Program Transcript
Rick Shallenberger—Year C Epiphany 4
Anthony: Brother, let’s do this. We’re here to talk about the lectionary text, and our first pericope of the month is 1 Corinthians 13:1-13. I’ll be reading from the New Revised Standard Version Updated Edition. It is a Revised Common Lectionary passage for the fourth Sunday after Epiphany, February 2, and it reads,
If I speak in the tongues of humans and of angels but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic powers and understand all mysteries and all knowledge and if I have all faith so as to remove mountains but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all my possessions and if I hand over my body so that I may boast but do not have love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable; it keeps no record of wrongs; 6 it does not rejoice in wrongdoing but rejoices in the truth. 7 It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will come to an end. 9 For we know only in part, and we prophesy only in part, 10 but when the complete comes, the partial will come to an end. 11 When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. 12 For now we see only a reflection, as in a mirror, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. 13 And now faith, hope, and love remain, these three, and the greatest of these is love.
So, Rick, there seems to be a lot of noisy gonging and clanging going on these days, too often from Christians. In what ways do we need to be conformed to Christ so that when we’re speaking, we’re only speaking in love.
Rick: That’s a powerful question. This passage I’ve used in many different ways.
Often, obviously I use it in weddings, the middle section of it, but this passage is really about God and who He is, but it’s also — and I love this about the Scriptures. They often have much more meaning than one particular focus, and we can get so much out of it. But you’re right, Anthony. We hear a lot of gonging and clanging from Christians.
And unfortunately, we hear a lot of it during the election process, gonging and clanging on both sides. And it’s interesting because we see, unfortunately, we see Christians on both sides of almost every issue. I shouldn’t say unfortunately, because it’s probably fortunate that we do, because it reveals to us that Jesus came to save all.
It doesn’t matter what issue we’re facing in society and what side Christians find themselves on — and we find ourselves on different sides because of our different backstories and our environments and so many other different factors. But it does point out to us that Jesus came to save all Republicans, Democrats, and dependents, Jews, Muslims, atheists, Jews, Gentiles, males, females, slaves and free!
The gospel is good news for all, but it seems we haven’t changed much from the early church who believed everyone must believe and act just like we do. So, we frequently fall in the area of loving others.
And the love that Paul is referring to, Anthony, is, as you’ve referred to, is charity. That’s the word a lot of translators use. But it comes from the Greek word agape. And agape is not referring to charity in the sense of giving a donation somewhere. Sure. But agape is referring to love in its fullest and most extensive meaning — true love to God and true love to man.
And as I read this, I can’t help but think that Paul might be referring to what’s known as the Two Great Commandments. “Love God with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength, and to love your neighbors yourself.” And I wouldn’t disagree with that, but I also believe that he’s referring to addressing the real problem here, and that’s not obeying the new commandment Jesus gave to us, which we find in John 13.
I know that’s off the pericope, but it relates, and that is, “I give you a new commandment that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you should also love one another.” And then of course, in 35, he says, “by this, everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” But I think this passage describes what that love is like.
I think Paul is referring to love as a way of life, putting others first. And he knows human nature, and our nature is to love from a distance.
Let me give you some examples. I love people by speaking in tongues and helping them see what it means to be in close connection with God. Or I love people by prophesying to them, giving them a special message I believe is from God to them. And of course, not that I’d put my own thoughts in that prophetic message, of course. Or I might give away all my possessions and people can see how sacrificial I am.
And these things are not wrong. But Anthony, they don’t include loving others as Jesus loves me or you. In other words, they don’t include pointing them to the One who loves them first. I guess I’d say if love doesn’t include building relationship, then it’s nothing more than a loud cymbal that might make you jump. But it doesn’t really help in your personal journey with Jesus. Does that make sense?
Anthony: It does. It does. I’ve long believed Rick that one of the best ways we can express our love to God is by loving our neighbor. It’s loving the other people in our lives. And I came across a quote from George McDonald, one of my favorite authors, and he said, “We are made for love, not for self. Our neighbor is our refuge; self is our demon foe.”
And that can seem really like an in-your-face quote, but there’s something to that because we often take care of ourselves, don’t we? We put ourselves first, but the way that our love for God gets expressed best is by loving those people around us, including them in relationship.
Rick: As you say that, I’m thinking all the self-help books of the 80s and 90s and the “me movements” and all the pain in relationships you see when you start to focus on the self. It’s all about me, it’s about my happiness, and it’s about what I want and what gives me peace.
And if we aren’t loving others as you said, then — and as John says in, I think it’s his second or third letter — then we aren’t loving God because they are together. One leads to the other, and we cannot say we love God if we don’t love others. And if we’re always putting the self or are focused on the self, then it’s easy to see all kinds of ways and reasons not to love other people because I’ve got to take care of myself and I’ve got to get right with God and I’ve got to find out who I am.
And if that’s at your expense, too bad.
Anthony: Yeah. I’m thinking of just imagery of a lake that gets dammed up or a body of water, a small body of water that gets dammed up and how water is meant to flow out. And when it’s dammed up, bacteria can set up. It’s not healthy for the fish life in that area.
It’s meant to flow out of us to others. And just thinking of George McDonald again, and I’m just going to loosely paraphrase what I remember him saying: our true belief is what we live by. It’s not what we think; it’s what we do that expresses the true theology of our soul. And so, to say that God loves us and then we don’t love others, we don’t get it. To have received God’s grace and then not be gracious to other others is not to understand grace.
So, it has to get expressed out to others. And so, let’s think more about that. Let’s get personal about it. I’m going to ask you to testify how you, Rick Shallenberger, have experienced God’s goodness made manifest in the church. How have you experienced the kind of love talked about in this passage in and through the church and what impact did it have on your life?
Rick: You told me we only had an hour.
Anthony: And I’m going to stick to it, buddy.
Rick: I grew up in a cult of legalism, so my behavior was constantly being judged, and that wasn’t just a perception that was a reality. And it made me feel “less than” in many ways. So, the first thing I had to learn was the love that God was displaying toward me and how I can then express that love toward others.
So, I’ll never forget the first Promise Keepers event I attended. You know here I was in a legalistic group, and I believe that I had a special relationship with God and not a lot of other groups did. And I went in this hall or stadium, and I saw thousands of men from every denomination, worshiping and praying together, and that really shook me in a very good way.
But I also attended with three pastors who took the opportunity during that weekend to really speak life into me. And they pointed out the gifts that God had given to me. They talked about how God was calling me to pastoral ministry. They assured me that they would walk beside me in that ministry and be there for me if I took on the role of a pastor.
And I did. I began my pastoral ministry just a few months later. And those three men spoke into my life for years until all three of them have had their spiritual homecoming. But they helped me understand who Jesus is, who Jesus was in me and who Jesus was in others. And that’s what helped me to form what I call this ministry of sharing God’s love and life with others.
So, what they did was they entered my world, and they walked with me. Just as I quoted from John 13:34, they walked with me. They were constantly giving me encouragement affirmation guidance and even correction They loved me the way Jesus loved me. I’ll never forget them, and I’ve tried really hard to pattern my life after their example.
So, I understand when Paul said to Timothy, “Follow me as I follow Christ.” I think that’s a really good phrase, and these men did that. I followed them as they followed Christ, and it’s helped me form the way I do ministry.
Anthony: Thank God for those three men.
You know as we’re recording this, Rick, we’re in the season of Advent (though the passages we’re looking at are post Epiphany). And in the season of Advent, we often proclaim the gospel found in Luke 1. It’s often referred to as Mary’s Magnificat where she encounters her cousin Elizabeth in her home. And Mary had not been telling anyone that she was pregnant, with child, and what the angel had told her. But as soon as she walks in, there is this recognition by Elizabeth and the child within her.
And she affirms Mary. “You are with child. And that child is blessed, and I’m just amazed that you came to see me.” (paraphrased) and Mary hadn’t told her that. But it’s like those three men speaking into your life, affirming and confirming what the Lord is doing by the Spirit and having others recognize that, to have the observation of the Spirit, to see it. It’s really powerful.
So, I appreciate you sharing that story.
Rick: And Anthony, one of the things that just struck me as you were telling that story, and I think I read this recently. It’s fascinating that the very first being to worship and leap in joy for Jesus was a fetus.
Isn’t that amazing? That’s how powerful God is. That the something in that fetus just experienced the joy and made it leap in Elizabeth’s womb. I find that just fascinating
Anthony: It is fascinating! Rocks can cry out and fetuses can proclaim the truth. Hallelujah. Praise god.
Program Transcript
Rick Shallenberger—Year C Epiphany 4
Anthony: Brother, let’s do this. We’re here to talk about the lectionary text, and our first pericope of the month is 1 Corinthians 13:1-13. I’ll be reading from the New Revised Standard Version Updated Edition. It is a Revised Common Lectionary passage for the fourth Sunday after Epiphany, February 2, and it reads,
If I speak in the tongues of humans and of angels but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic powers and understand all mysteries and all knowledge and if I have all faith so as to remove mountains but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all my possessions and if I hand over my body so that I may boast but do not have love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable; it keeps no record of wrongs; 6 it does not rejoice in wrongdoing but rejoices in the truth. 7 It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will come to an end. 9 For we know only in part, and we prophesy only in part, 10 but when the complete comes, the partial will come to an end. 11 When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. 12 For now we see only a reflection, as in a mirror, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. 13 And now faith, hope, and love remain, these three, and the greatest of these is love.
So, Rick, there seems to be a lot of noisy gonging and clanging going on these days, too often from Christians. In what ways do we need to be conformed to Christ so that when we’re speaking, we’re only speaking in love.
Rick: That’s a powerful question. This passage I’ve used in many different ways.
Often, obviously I use it in weddings, the middle section of it, but this passage is really about God and who He is, but it’s also — and I love this about the Scriptures. They often have much more meaning than one particular focus, and we can get so much out of it. But you’re right, Anthony. We hear a lot of gonging and clanging from Christians.
And unfortunately, we hear a lot of it during the election process, gonging and clanging on both sides. And it’s interesting because we see, unfortunately, we see Christians on both sides of almost every issue. I shouldn’t say unfortunately, because it’s probably fortunate that we do, because it reveals to us that Jesus came to save all.
It doesn’t matter what issue we’re facing in society and what side Christians find themselves on — and we find ourselves on different sides because of our different backstories and our environments and so many other different factors. But it does point out to us that Jesus came to save all Republicans, Democrats, and dependents, Jews, Muslims, atheists, Jews, Gentiles, males, females, slaves and free!
The gospel is good news for all, but it seems we haven’t changed much from the early church who believed everyone must believe and act just like we do. So, we frequently fall in the area of loving others.
And the love that Paul is referring to, Anthony, is, as you’ve referred to, is charity. That’s the word a lot of translators use. But it comes from the Greek word agape. And agape is not referring to charity in the sense of giving a donation somewhere. Sure. But agape is referring to love in its fullest and most extensive meaning — true love to God and true love to man.
And as I read this, I can’t help but think that Paul might be referring to what’s known as the Two Great Commandments. “Love God with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength, and to love your neighbors yourself.” And I wouldn’t disagree with that, but I also believe that he’s referring to addressing the real problem here, and that’s not obeying the new commandment Jesus gave to us, which we find in John 13.
I know that’s off the pericope, but it relates, and that is, “I give you a new commandment that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you should also love one another.” And then of course, in 35, he says, “by this, everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” But I think this passage describes what that love is like.
I think Paul is referring to love as a way of life, putting others first. And he knows human nature, and our nature is to love from a distance.
Let me give you some examples. I love people by speaking in tongues and helping them see what it means to be in close connection with God. Or I love people by prophesying to them, giving them a special message I believe is from God to them. And of course, not that I’d put my own thoughts in that prophetic message, of course. Or I might give away all my possessions and people can see how sacrificial I am.
And these things are not wrong. But Anthony, they don’t include loving others as Jesus loves me or you. In other words, they don’t include pointing them to the One who loves them first. I guess I’d say if love doesn’t include building relationship, then it’s nothing more than a loud cymbal that might make you jump. But it doesn’t really help in your personal journey with Jesus. Does that make sense?
Anthony: It does. It does. I’ve long believed Rick that one of the best ways we can express our love to God is by loving our neighbor. It’s loving the other people in our lives. And I came across a quote from George McDonald, one of my favorite authors, and he said, “We are made for love, not for self. Our neighbor is our refuge; self is our demon foe.”
And that can seem really like an in-your-face quote, but there’s something to that because we often take care of ourselves, don’t we? We put ourselves first, but the way that our love for God gets expressed best is by loving those people around us, including them in relationship.
Rick: As you say that, I’m thinking all the self-help books of the 80s and 90s and the “me movements” and all the pain in relationships you see when you start to focus on the self. It’s all about me, it’s about my happiness, and it’s about what I want and what gives me peace.
And if we aren’t loving others as you said, then — and as John says in, I think it’s his second or third letter — then we aren’t loving God because they are together. One leads to the other, and we cannot say we love God if we don’t love others. And if we’re always putting the self or are focused on the self, then it’s easy to see all kinds of ways and reasons not to love other people because I’ve got to take care of myself and I’ve got to get right with God and I’ve got to find out who I am.
And if that’s at your expense, too bad.
Anthony: Yeah. I’m thinking of just imagery of a lake that gets dammed up or a body of water, a small body of water that gets dammed up and how water is meant to flow out. And when it’s dammed up, bacteria can set up. It’s not healthy for the fish life in that area.
It’s meant to flow out of us to others. And just thinking of George McDonald again, and I’m just going to loosely paraphrase what I remember him saying: our true belief is what we live by. It’s not what we think; it’s what we do that expresses the true theology of our soul. And so, to say that God loves us and then we don’t love others, we don’t get it. To have received God’s grace and then not be gracious to other others is not to understand grace.
So, it has to get expressed out to others. And so, let’s think more about that. Let’s get personal about it. I’m going to ask you to testify how you, Rick Shallenberger, have experienced God’s goodness made manifest in the church. How have you experienced the kind of love talked about in this passage in and through the church and what impact did it have on your life?
Rick: You told me we only had an hour.
Anthony: And I’m going to stick to it, buddy.
Rick: I grew up in a cult of legalism, so my behavior was constantly being judged, and that wasn’t just a perception that was a reality. And it made me feel “less than” in many ways. So, the first thing I had to learn was the love that God was displaying toward me and how I can then express that love toward others.
So, I’ll never forget the first Promise Keepers event I attended. You know here I was in a legalistic group, and I believe that I had a special relationship with God and not a lot of other groups did. And I went in this hall or stadium, and I saw thousands of men from every denomination, worshiping and praying together, and that really shook me in a very good way.
But I also attended with three pastors who took the opportunity during that weekend to really speak life into me. And they pointed out the gifts that God had given to me. They talked about how God was calling me to pastoral ministry. They assured me that they would walk beside me in that ministry and be there for me if I took on the role of a pastor.
And I did. I began my pastoral ministry just a few months later. And those three men spoke into my life for years until all three of them have had their spiritual homecoming. But they helped me understand who Jesus is, who Jesus was in me and who Jesus was in others. And that’s what helped me to form what I call this ministry of sharing God’s love and life with others.
So, what they did was they entered my world, and they walked with me. Just as I quoted from John 13:34, they walked with me. They were constantly giving me encouragement affirmation guidance and even correction They loved me the way Jesus loved me. I’ll never forget them, and I’ve tried really hard to pattern my life after their example.
So, I understand when Paul said to Timothy, “Follow me as I follow Christ.” I think that’s a really good phrase, and these men did that. I followed them as they followed Christ, and it’s helped me form the way I do ministry.
Anthony: Thank God for those three men.
You know as we’re recording this, Rick, we’re in the season of Advent (though the passages we’re looking at are post Epiphany). And in the season of Advent, we often proclaim the gospel found in Luke 1. It’s often referred to as Mary’s Magnificat where she encounters her cousin Elizabeth in her home. And Mary had not been telling anyone that she was pregnant, with child, and what the angel had told her. But as soon as she walks in, there is this recognition by Elizabeth and the child within her.
And she affirms Mary. “You are with child. And that child is blessed, and I’m just amazed that you came to see me.” (paraphrased) and Mary hadn’t told her that. But it’s like those three men speaking into your life, affirming and confirming what the Lord is doing by the Spirit and having others recognize that, to have the observation of the Spirit, to see it. It’s really powerful.
So, I appreciate you sharing that story.
Rick: And Anthony, one of the things that just struck me as you were telling that story, and I think I read this recently. It’s fascinating that the very first being to worship and leap in joy for Jesus was a fetus.
Isn’t that amazing? That’s how powerful God is. That the something in that fetus just experienced the joy and made it leap in Elizabeth’s womb. I find that just fascinating
Anthony: It is fascinating! Rocks can cry out and fetuses can proclaim the truth. Hallelujah. Praise god.
Small Group Discussion Questions
- How can we live more fully into Paul’s description of love?
- What does Paul’s description of love tell us about God’s heart and character?
- Can you think of how we may be using our gifts in a way that does not flow from God’s love?
- How does the permanency of love shape how we act towards others in the present?
